Colonoscomeeeeeeee. Holy $%#
So here I am at 2:30 am writing a story. Why am I up so early you ask?
Welcome to colonoscopy 101. Boy, it’s fun getting older. NOT!
About 2 years ago at my physical, my Dr. recommended I get my colonoscopy as I was turning 50.
Well, one week turned into a month and then another 2 years.
So after my physical last month, he convinced me it was time for one and I did oblige and now, here I am at 2:30 in the morning watching SportsCenter and making frequents sprints to the bathroom.
Oh, so you never had one? Well officially I haven’t but let me tell you about the pre-colonoscopy procedure.
First of all, it starts 3 days prior as you are supposed to stop eating raw vegetables and eat a low fiber diet ( opposite of what my normal routine is ) for the next 2 days.
Oh..it gets better. The day before it is liquids only.
At first, I didn’t think this would be a big deal. Boy, was I wrong!
I had no idea how much I think about food each day and even more importantly how much I enjoy eating food. Sounds crazy I know but until you have done it…it is awful. Every dish our cooks prepared look like the best ever as I enjoyed my chicken stock and tea.
The night before the fun really starts!
You start by taking 4 pills which act as a pre laxative. I took those earlier and thought to myself that this wasn’t so bad.
But then 3 hours later you get to drink the first of 2 32oz bottles of Gatorade.
There is a catch. You add what seems like a 5-pound bag of a strong laxative to each bottle.
Oh my goodness. After 30 minutes after drinking my first bottle, I felt like a volcano. Holy %\\$!
I had no idea my body was capable of what I was putting it through. Yikes.
After an hour or so I was finally able to leave my bathroom.
Fast forward 4 hours later. You got it. Bottle number 2. Have you ever tried drinking 32 ounces of Gatorade at 2:30 in the morning let alone Gatorade packed with laxatives?
It’s not pretty!
So here I am with my SportsCenter waiting to go to the hospital for my 6 am colonoscopy.
I hope that wasn’t TMI.
If your Dr. asks you to get one I would not put it off and just get’er done!